We are headed to Pismo this afternoon. It is a combination New Year's celebration but, more important, we are celebrating Lex turning 40 this month.

Hard to believe! The fact that 2006 is drawing to a close, AND, the fact that my sweet man is turning 40.

We plan on relaxing, eating, laughing, playing games, lighting off some almost legal fireworks on New Year's Eve, and generally, just refreshing ourselves and enjoying time together.

I wish you all could be with us. That would make it even better...but, for now, let me just say Happy New Year to you all!

May God's hand continue to be on you and your family.
May you find new and beautiful ways to serve in the Kingdom in 2007, and may you be inspired to seek out every missional opportunity in the coming year.

Blessings!

The Morning After

We had a wonderful Christmas Eve and Day with family.

It is so good to be together.

I am amazed each year by the generosity and thoughtfulness of people.

I woke up this morning feeling very blessed and fortunate.

God is good. God is amazing.
I am so thankful to be his child.
What a wonderful thing.

What a wonderful night!

Singers were fantastic.

Children were priceless.

Narrators were perfect.

Tech team was flawless.

Seniors holding candles were precious.

Interpreters (sign language) were exquisite.

Amongst the practiced and rehearsed, God came.
He filled up the room.
He filled up the hearts.

He did for us last night what He does for us every day...
He covered us with grace and mercy and made us better than we really are!
Thank you, Jesus...Thank you!

This is what I want to feel like...
This is how I want to be seen...
This is my goal...










This is how I feel inside!







But don't tell...I don't want it to get out that I'm losing my mind and wondering how in the world I'm going to pull this all off. I mean, everything. The Musical, Christmas, Presents, Worship this Sunday, Pictures for the directory...(do you know how stressful that is? C'mon...admit it, directory pics are horrible!)

God is in charge, God is in charge, God is in charge...

O.K. I feel better.
Now, does anyone out there have a 3 day diet that will allow me to continue to eat but lose about 50 lbs before Sunday? Anybody?
I sure hope my dress zips up Sunday night!

Have a good Wednesday!

Rehearsal went well...there are some little gliches we need to work out, however, I believe we are on target for a wonderful night this coming Sunday. YIKES!!

I've even managed to get some Christmas shopping done with presents wrapped and under the tree. I keep wondering what I've forgotten because things seem to be running rather smoothly.

I had one "key" alto tell me yesterday they had a family conflict with our Saturday morning rehearsal...that's the rehearsal where every single person is in place. It all comes together on that morning, except this year...this year we will be depending on the airlines, the weather, and general holiday travel to get that alto back and in her place on Sunday. No problem...

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Working on a very cool band we've named the "House Band" for a worship time at the ZOE conference in January. If you're able, come check out the conference the last weekend in January. (26th - 28th) It's wonderful to see people able to use their gifts and passion for their instrument in a worship element. I feel sorry, sometimes, for the folks who have such a love for their instrument but have a commitment to the Church of Christ. This isn't a debate for or against instrumental music...just simply an observation.

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Had a wonderful chat with one of the sweetest people I've ever had the pleasure of knowing. She's a rock here at College...somebody who has been here since the beginning. She encourages constantly, sees the best in people, continues to study and learn about Jesus Christ. She is over 70, and yet, continues to learn like a 5 year old. With passion and hunger for more. She's one who will say to me, "I don't tell you enough what a wonderful job you do." What a blessing to have people like that in your life. I was looking at her this morning as we were chatting and thinking I hope I can be as gracious and beautiful and Godly as she when I'm an older woman. Beautiful example.

Have a wonderful week, Bloggers. Try to catch the goodness of it all as this season becomes more hectic with each passing day.

December 7 is a date that many remember as Pearl Harbor Day.

December 7 holds additional meaning for me.

I remember my Dad as gentle. He never raised his voice or yelled.

I remember my Dad as a Bible scholar...always reading and studying.

I remember that my Dad broke C of C lines as he had Saturday prayer meetings with Catholics, Pentecostal, and even "one-cuppers".

I remember he struggled...really struggled with depression.

I remember listening to him talk about heaven, and being with God, and how much he was looking forward to that.

I remember my Dad coming in every night to tuck me into bed and telling me the story that always began..."once upon a time, there was a beautiful little girl..." I never tired of the story of my adoption according to Dad.

I remember my Dad could tell a joke.

And boy, oh boy, could he sneeze! That man scared us to death with his sneezes!

I remember my Dad bought my Mom really pretty clothes. For the most part, church clothes. Nice clothes. Things she would never have bought for herself.

I remember my Dad thanking my Mom for the good dinner...every single night.

I remember my Dad telling me there was something special about Lex.

I remember putting Ashley on his lap in this cute little stiff church outfit, and he said, "hasn't she worn this long enough? Can we take this off her so she can relax?"

I've often wished he had stuck around a little longer. There has been much to rejoice about in our family. Many good times and great blessings that I know, had he still been here, he would have enjoyed.

But, I also know he longed to be where he is...with God...for eternity.

Happy Birthday, Dad.

God took care of Sunday. Of course, again. As always.

I explained to the Praise Team my "sail boat" feeling and they understood. We managed to joke for the rest of the morning using sailing metaphors. It was a good distractor, as well as reminder, that we aren't in charge.

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My girl called me Sunday afternoon sounding awful. She's sick...first time away from home feeling really lousy. She went to the on campus medical thingy and they said she has a severe allergy to mold and dust. Abilene happens to be full of both! She never suffered here in the valley, like many do, but they said it isn't uncommon for out of towners to suffer quite a bit the first year they're there. (Hey, Wendy...how 'bout that...proper use of "they're" and "there".) So, we're praying and hoping she feels better in quick time.

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Sunday night rehearsal was amazing. I couldn't believe I was standing there with mics and narrators and soloists and the music. Time has flown. I mean, just absolutely raced by. Everything was beautiful. We aren't perfect...yet, but we'll be pretty close by the time the 17th rolls around.

One of my favorite things about doing a musical is what happens on the sidelines. Sure, it's a thrill to present...to perform. But the real stuff happens internally on people.

One person told me she felt like she really "belonged" by singing. She hadn't found her place yet, and through this time of practice, she's found friends and a "spot" she feels she fits in.

We have a young soloist who is the very picture of a beautiful, innocent, Godly young woman...growing and changing in the love of Christ. I tear up every time she sings her part because of the sweetness of it.

There are children singing with all their heart!

There are the "not-so-young" singing for the first time and learning new things.

We have close to professional people doing their thing on a solo...knocking our socks off every time.

We have fellowship, and laughter, and tears. Hard work, frustration, and "oops...let's try that again."

But my very favorite part is when I look around and realize, nobody is watching me any longer...now understand, I am the director...or at least I play one every Sunday, and most director's get a little cranky when you don't watch their lead...but when they aren't watching me, they are worshipping. Full-on-lost-in-the-moment worship.

That's the best part...the very best part.

There are many things on my list of "things to do before I die..."

Travel, write (books and songs), photograph, love more, etc etc.

One thing that is not on my list, and probably will never be, is sailing. Going out on a boat in the middle of the ocean using some triangle sheets and the wind to create my security is not my idea of fun...or even adventure. It just sounds crazy.

So, when I tell you that there are Sundays that feel like that, do you understand me? Oh, sure, it looks like I'm on the ground floor singing or praying or listening...but in my mind, I'm on the open ocean with no land in sight and some triangle sheets.

This Sunday will be on of those days. No fault of anybody, I just don't have the normal "control" over the day.

Here's the thing that might surprise you...I'm learning to like those days more than the typical Sunday.

God shows Himself to me more on the open sea than on the dry, safe land.

So, instead of dreading the time, I'm looking forward to it...God really is the Master of the Sea...I just need to step out there more often so He can demonstrate His amazing self to me.

Blessings for a wonderful weekend, bloggers.

One of my favorite things about the Thanksgiving holiday is our family time on Wednesday night...a time we lovingly call "PIE NIGHT".

When you eat the Thanksgiving feast on Thursday, and then look around at the pies people have made, you feel like you just must have a piece...even though you are about ready to POP!

So, we have decided to take all our pies, and bring them together Wednesday night for our Thankful Pie Night time.

Everybody fills out a 3X5 card sharing what they are particularly thankful for this year. We read these cards out loud and try to guess who's card we're listening to. There's even a prize for the one who guesses the most number correctly. (Competition...it's a beautiful thing!)

I loved this year listening to my children's cards. I especially loved my nephew, James, having a card this year for the first time. Listening to thankful hearts is uplifting, inspiring, and encouraging. It's so good for us to have to stop, sit down, and verbalize what we are thankful for.

Sunday, church was beautiful. It was wonderful to have my girl on the Worship Team again...even if for only a day. We grabbed a quick bite and then headed for the airport. It wasn't horrible.

I watched until she got through the security check and as she turned back with a beautiful smile and a big wave, I thought of how much she's grown in just a few short months.

The boys were standing by in case I had a mild break down, but nope...not this time. I smiled, waved back, and turned quickly to head back to the car. I didn't talk for a couple of miles...but finally, the lump went down a bit. No tears...just a quivering chin...maybe she's not the only one growing.

Have a blessed week.

Today, in fact, as I write this, my daughter is in the air coming home. She will arrive in Fresno at 12:40 and I will be there to welcome her.

I will hug her, and smell her, and kiss her, and squeeze her, and tell her how wonderful it is to see her.

We have cleaned the house, put fresh flowers in her room, changed her bed, and put a one of her favorite magazines on the night stand.

We can't wait to see her.

So, I've said this before, but I can't help but wonder if God is as excited to welcome us home. Or if His desire to see us come home is off the charts compared to mine...(my human mind can't quite wrap around Him being any more excited to see me than I am to see her today).

I'm so glad my girl is excited to come home...wouldn't it be terrible if your kids didn't really want to come back?

My Dad used to long for heaven and I thought he was just goofy...almost made us feel bad because of his great desire to leave this earth and join God.

I wonder, though, if he didn't have a better handle on it than I.

All I know for today is that I can't wait to get my hands on her.

May you all feel blessed and loved...and may your hearts overflow with thankfulness!

Every year, about this time, I have a day when I find myself paralyzed with the fear that I won't get every thing done.

I won't be able to pull off all the details of the Christmas Musical (which happens to be beautiful this year in so many ways), ZOE Fresno is right around the corner, (have I done all I can do to get more people here?), and then there is the normal things regarding this season that bring some anxiety. (Gifts, shopping, finances, house decorating, tree decorating, and so on and so on.)

Yesterday was my day to feel like there's absolutely no way I am going to be able to handle each thing in the way I want to handle it...which is flawless and extraordinarily.

So, I told the boys when they rolled in last night..."no dinner, we're going out."

We went to one of my favorite Mexican food places and they seated us in a room with no one else. For me, this was wonderful. However, my little slice of heaven only lasted a few seconds as the waitress comes up to our table, slams her hands down as she leans in and says, "Oh My! Quick, hurry up and order, they're about to SLAM me!"

She then spends the rest of our time there telling us all she has to do, how she works too many nights, (she's only supposed to work 2-3 nights and she's working 5-6), she needed to make cupcakes for her sons class because they decided at the last minute to have a party, she had made cupcakes for her daughters class just the night before, she's in the middle of cleaning the house to prepare for the holiday decorating, how she LOVES, LOVES, LOVES, LOVES, LOVES Christmas, and how cute her kids are, which she then produced pictures of them from her apron.

After taking our order, we had this bus boy who was actually TOO attentive. Seriously, every minute he walked by and asked if we were o.k., did we need refills, more chips, salsa, now do we want guacamole?

Needless to say, this time that was supposed to relax my heart, made me even more crazy. It became so bad, it was comical. Avery said he had a head ache and Lex was just trying to get us 0ut of there without me losing it.

This is also the time of year I begin sleeping rather poorly. I fall to sleep easily, but the dreams that come are amazingly ridiculous! And they don't subside until about February. I know this because it happens every year. I've learned to accept it.

So, today, I'm checking my email and there it was...the scripture of the day...

Jeremiah 17:7-8
But blessed are those who trust in the Lord and have made the Lord their hope and confidence. They are like trees planted along the riverbank.

Aahhh...thank you, Lord.

I knew that, but thank you for giving me that "ice water in the face" moment. You see, every year, I feel the same, and every year, He does something to remind me to relax and enjoy Him. Because as much as I would like to believe I'm in control of all those little details, it's such a relief when I wake up my stubborn self and remember it's all in His hands...

Maybe the waitress at my favorite Mexican restaurant needs to hear this...

...But...I'm so Comfortable!

Has the Lord ever put something on your heart in such a way that you can't ignore it?

Well, you can, but really, you can't. I mean, you can turn away, act busy, fake distraction...whatever you need to do, but whatever you do...it just keeps coming back?

I'm there. Been there for a while. Already turned away, acted busy, faked distraction...

I'm still there...and He's still there. I love where I'm at. I'm comfortable. Not too busy, not bored...just right. Very comfortable. Hhmmm...God has other plans...

So, sweet friends, pray for me...and I will pray for you...that you, too, will find discomfort in your comfort.

Blessings...

Ready the Room!

If asked what I did today, I will answer,
"I prepared my daughter's room for her visit."

Ashley left, as you all know, in August to attend ACU.

There have been sad moments, but for the most part, my heart has been full of joy and pride and gratefulness for the success she has found in her new environment.

I have, however, found it difficult to be in her room. She did a pretty good job of cleaning it out before she left. That may have been what was difficult. She went through all her "stuff" and got rid of bags and bags of clutter. Youth and adolescent clutter. I kept thinking I'd go in there and make the bed she stripped, maybe move the dresser and clean behind it, possibly dust and spruce up the curtains. To this point, however, that hasn't happened.

I've found it very convenient to just walk on by. I really couldn't even step in there. Too sad for me.

But today, I got an email from her saying "only 11 more days until I'm home!"

Today, I stepped in the room. Straightened curtains, ironed pillow cases so they'll be super fresh for her, moved the dresser (oh my!) to clean behind it, and prepared her room for a visit.

I can't tell you the pure joy in doing those tasks. The sheer excitement of preparing the room for her was so sweet.

It made me think about Jesus going to prepare a place for me...for you. I wonder if He feels that same excitement as he "prepares" our rooms for our return to Him. I wonder if there are special touches in mine meant just for me. I wonder if His heart swells to think about me returning to spend eternity with Him. I'm human...He's God...so I imagine I really can't know completely how He feels.

But today, I began preparations to receive my baby girl home...
Just as He prepares to receive us home...

Sweet thoughts...both of them.

FILM FEST 2006

One of the things I'm most impressed about with ACU is the way they empower, teach, show possible the concept of taking your Christianity to the world in practical ways.

You don't have to be a teacher or preacher of the Word to have an impact in society for Jesus Christ. You just have to live your faith...in all arenas.




This weekend was another example of that as they put on the Film Festival allowing students to stretch and grow as writers, producers, directors, and actors of films they had created.

I don't know the whole scope of the "FilmFest" time. I know I am unaware of the complexity of the concept and the vision of those who have worked so hard to develop this idea. But I do know my daughter was impressed with the quality of work and the excitement that surrounded the great formal evening.

Our friend, Brandon, was a judge. Ashley loved seeing him. This community of believers we belong to is such a tremendous blessing. Seeing Brandon is like seeing family. It felt good.

As an adopted person, I've always seen family as something larger than the blood relative concept. It has made my Christian walk deeper...my relationships sweeter.

So, today I'm thankful for a place my daughter can grow and learn and develop into a powerful servant in the Kingdom of God...and, I'm thankful for all of you...those who love me and my family because of the common love for Jesus Christ. 

"Graduate Services"

I walked into the "Graduate Services" office and told them who I was and that I was there to pick up my son's Class Ring. This was my second visit to this office...last year, to pick up my daughter's, was, of course, my first.

She asked what school he was from and then disappeared to the back room and quickly came back with a little box. As she opened the box, I gasped out loud...

"Oh my goodness...that can't possibly be my son's ring...that ring looks like it would fit a man! This boy is my baby." (I can't really believe I said those words...but it was too late.)

She looked at me with an understanding expression and said,
"Is this your first or your last one?"

"My last" I choked out.

I couldn't help it. The tears just came out silently.

"The ring is beautiful...he's going to love it. Thank you."

As I tried to write out the check, the tears kept getting in the way. I really just needed to get out of there. For some reason, the whole thing surprised me. It was just a quick stop I was making to finish up a day full of errands. I had no intention of feeling any sort of way...it totally shocked me and snuck up on me.

Then, she broke the ice and said..."Weren't you in here last year?"

I laughed remembering that I had the same reaction last year..."Yes, I was the nutty Mom in here crying last year when I picked up my daughter's ring."

"So, she was your first?"

"Yes...but truthfully, I think I could have had 15 and I would probably have the same reaction 15 times...It's the transition, the step, the slipping away of childhood with the onset of adulthood that makes the lump in my throat stick."

She smiled politely and told me if he ever has any problems, there is a life time warranty on the ring.

I handed over the check and slipped the ring in my purse.

Last night, I gave him his ring...and what do you know...that huge man sized ring fit him perfectly.

He loved it.

Blessings.

I blogged a few days ago, but kept it as a draft because I thought, after reading it, it was just whining. So, I read it again today, and yup...I was feeling sorry for myself...

But I'll tell you what it was about without the whining part.

I blogged about the many things I miss about having my kids home and young and within my control. I love the baby stage, I love the toddler stage, I love the elementary stage, I even love the teen-age stage (even though folks tried to tell me it was horrible! I disagree.) And, I love this independent stage. But, I miss those other stages. Particularly the babies and toddler age.

So, those of you who have had kids, tell me what you loved the most...or what you miss the most. Maybe it will help me to see that I'm not the only one who has a broken heart from time to time.

And kids, in case you're reading this...
Your 'ole mom is just fine. Really. I'm great.
No...really...doing terrific! No worries here...Fantastic.
Totally cool with this new life stage...

Blessings.

Teachers...

There is a profession that is, I believe, misunderstood unless you are in that profession yourself. I believe some people think teachers have it easy. You know, all that vacation time, finishing at 3:00 every day, watching movies when you don't feel like teaching, etc...

Although there are those who give teaching a bad rap, I believe there are many more who go the extra mile and realize what a ministry it really is. What an amazing influence these teachers have on our children.

So, for my post today, this is an acknowledgement of the hard work and endless hours some teachers put into the kids.

Avery had a teacher as a Freshman by the name of Mr. Hieger.

This is the teacher that drew Avery into the Rocket Project with NASA...this is the man who lets kids come in and eat their lunch in his room just to hang out...this is the teacher who spent thousands of his own dollars to keep the Rocket Project going when the red tape would have hindered the project...this is the guy who has worked with Avery on his (Avery's) truck...this is the man who came home from a full day of teaching just to find a group of kids at his home wanting/needing to use the tools in his garage for building...he not only let them stay, but fed them dinner...this is the guy who, when Lex and I arrived home from church last night about 9:00 pm, was standing in my drive way helping Avery unload some HUGE, HEAVY truck parts Avery had just purchased.

He is patient, good, smart, and caring. The kids love him. This is a teacher who will be "the one" Avery remembers all of his life. Last night, after Avery finally came in the house and Mr. Hieger had left, I said, "Mr. Hieger sure is a nice man..."

Avery smiled big and replied..."Yes, he's pretty cool." (for a teenage young man, that speaks volumes)

So, for those of you out there who are teachers by profession, thanks. You make a difference. May you feel an extra dose of blessing today!

ACU Homecoming Weekend...

Ashley called a couple of times to update us on the fun she was having. They had parades, a carnival, facepainting, (that's a purple paw print on her face)purple cotton candy, a homecoming queen from Bakersfield, CA, and a great football game!

ACU Football is 6-0. I guess this is something new for them in recent years. Ashley is enjoying all the fun of being a football fan supporting her school...it's especially fun to support a winning team.

We miss her...duh! But what a blessing to see so much goodness, learning, and enjoyment come her way. Thank you, God.

The HandOff

What an amazing Spirit-filled weekend it was!

The ZOE Conference has come to a close and I am back home in California at my desk that I love, in the church that I love, working with the people I love.

It is so good to be together for that time. The relationships God has blessed us with through his work are priceless...

I had to take Ashley to the folks who were also from Abilene...she had flown in with them and would return to ACU with them. They are a sweet, wonderful family by the name of the Maxwells. Jack and Jill are the artists for the ZOE group. Some of you have had the pleasure of seeing one of their creations come alive during a message time with Mike Cope. It really is a gift...

Their son, Matt, is a Mac-graphic-creative -film GENIUS. His creativity, coupled with his Godly character is an unstoppable force in our fellowship. We are so blessed to have such young creative thinking.

The Maxwells have taken Ashley in as their own. Jill is the one who has told her (and I) that if she is ever sick, call her. She'll drop everything to come get her and take her to a Dr or just to their home so she can get well. (Do you know what a relief that is to this mother as I am 1400 miles away from my baby girl?)

So, Sunday morning, on my way to church in Nashville, I took Ash to the Maxwells so they could return "home".

In the old days, when I was still the one "in charge" of Ashley's care, I would have walked in and been the first communication between Ashley and the Maxwell's. But now, I watched as I was the "side" one and my daughter and this precious family took up their relationship where it had left off in Abilene.

Matt quickly got up and took Ashley's suitcase to the car. They all exchanged conversation and just waited for me to tell her good-bye.

They took care of her meals, her comfort, her care.

I hugged her quickly, and she physically turned my body around and gave me a sweet, but determined little push out the door.

My little girl has come into her own life...Gracefully, beautifully, and in a Godly fashion.

Am I sad? No. Did I cry...of course.

So, as I mentioned at the top of this post, what a tremendous blessing it is to have relationship with each other through the covenant and blood of Jesus Christ.

Each one of you reading this, I'm guessing, can think of people that you know because of your commitment to the work of the Kingdom.

I hope this week, at some point, you will take the time to thank God for those people, and maybe even go so far as to tell them personally what they mean to you as we travel this road together.

Blessings!

Miss, Sandra, I Have a Surprise For You...

Walked in from a very long day with the ZOE Conference in Nashville. I am fortunate enough to have good friends here that I stay with, so, as Avery and I walked in to their beautiful home, ready for a quick, good sleep, their little girl said to me...

"Miss Sandra, I have a surprise for you...it's over here...in your room..."

I figured she had decorated my room or made me a picture or something.

I followed her as she opened my bedroom door...

I saw nothing different at first, and then, from behind the bed popped my daughter. (the daughter who should be at ACU going to classes and taking tests!)

I gasped, cried, grabbed her and held her until she laughed and said, "sorry, brother, I'll have to hug you later, I guess!"

She smelled so sweet. Anybody else out there very sensitive (and I mean VERY sensitive) to the different sweet smells of life?

My friend, Eric, thought she may need to come see her Momma. Actually, I think her Momma may have needed to see her...

Needless to say, it's wonderful being here in Nashville, but to have BOTH my kids with me is a tremendous blessing!